THCreate

Does Thanksgiving year reminded me of all the Thanksgiving years in the past. Memories of my best friend dying in a fatal car accident in 2011, to my little baby brother being traumatized at a Norton immediate Care. These are just some of the memories I have Thanksgiving growing up.

Other memories I recall as a child on Thanksgiving would be going to WaySide Christian mission to help serve the homeless community. At WaySide, I had the opportunity to help clean dishes so that hungry families entering the center would be properly fit. As a child it was very humbling.

This Thanksgiving, I spent it with my mom, Pops, siblings and my brother, who brought his daughter, my niece, and his wife. Being able to hang out with family during the holidays is very important so I try to make the most of utilizing the time appropriately in being off my phone to engage in a normal conversation.

The one thing you might be wondering is what ruined my Thanksgiving. Coparenting. Coparenting ruined my Thanksgiving. I see my children everyday aside from every other weekend they stay at their mother’s house, but I didn’t see my kids on a holiday where we are appreciative for those we love.

I made it clear to my children’s mother that when she was done with her family activities at a reasonable time, to contact me. This arrangement would allow our kids to see both families on a holiday. Two things to note: daylight savings time causes darkness at 5:40 p.m. and 7:30 p.m. usually means everybody is done gathering. I’m sure with these two time frames it doesn’t take a genius to realize that 7:30 is not sufficient time to bond with family when family has already left.

The frustration was my children’s mother wanting to drop my kids off so she can avoid her parenting night, so she can easily go to work the next day. Well that did not set well with me. The challenges of co-parenting will always be one I am unpleasantly forced to face. Having to deal with the other parent, one who the children likely do not want to go with, really puts a damper on my spirit.

I learned this morning that my children were not feeling well and crying, something I know they would not do if they were spending time with me. I hate wondering if my kids are happy when they are away from me. I hate wondering if my kids are being taken care of when they are away from me. There are some things in this world that I will not be able to control and that is the unfortunate part of being a separated parent.

Do my children enjoy time with Daddy more than Mommy? Of course. Hands down. My kids will always want to be with Daddy more than Mommy. I know what children need and I know how to cater to their wants and needs. That same catering is not understood by the other party.

Needless to say I had a wonderful Thanksgiving and I hope you had a wonderful Thanksgiving as well. Granted I did not see my children on a holiday where you are grateful for those you love most in your life, there is no doubt that my children know for a fact that Daddy loves them even though they did not see me. I hope they did not think I did not want to see them, and those are the kinds of things I think about.

To my kids Levi and Trinity, I love you so very much! You make Daddy so happy and I hope despite not seeing you that you had a really good holiday. We will be together soon, Love.